What If I Die Now

Sunday, October 22, 2006

I'm still only 19 years old and I'm writing such an entry. It is very weird of course, but come to think about it. I'm already 19.5 years old so quickly. Ageing. And I don't think I will live for long.

Now I thought of a quote mentioned in Sisy's World News. When the Lebanese war started, there was this 32 year old Israeli who said, "I'm only 32. I've so many things that I've not accomplished in my life. I don't want to die."

What if I really die when I'm 19? Not as if it's not impossible. I've seen someone die at such a young age before me. Now it seems that it's "logical" that old people die and young people don't realise they can die at this very moment. But...what if I really die now?


What If I Die Now

I'm just a normal person, 19 years old
There are so many years that should be ahead of me
There are so many things that I have not done
Yet I'm now forced to end my journey now

I am someone's son, and supposedly someone's father
There are so many things to experience
There are so many things to know
Yet I'm not given the chance to move on further

I will not be able to fulfil those promises that I've made
Those promises that I made to my previous soul-mate
I won't be able to meet you in this century anymore
Because I can't hang on already

I hate my destiny
Does it have to come to this
Yet I have to thank the almighty
For bringing me to where I am thus far

To all the souls I met in this world
I'm taking a move first
But if given the chance, I would
Shake all of your hands and say "I'm so glad I've met you"

I want to ask for more time to spare
Yet I know I can't ask for more
It's already such a colourful life
It's already all I can ask for

I don't understand, just don't understand
Why do I have to depart now
I don't deserve more?
Or it's just my destiny?

I hope my life is like a shooting star
With that spark of brilliance, lighting up everything
Not like an abandoned star
Doomed from the very beginning, when I started to live

- Jeffery 221006 2333

I hope this entry isn't that philosophical (I don't think it is though) and hope everyone likes it. Don't worry I don't have any terminal illnesses. Just something that I want to share and hopes everyone cherish their lives.