20

Sunday, April 01, 2007

I'm 20 years and 3 days old.

I've been alive for around 7000+ days.

And to have my age start with a digit 2 - reality seems to set in. Actually I've been losing track of my age since like 13 / 14. Time seems to slip pass day by day, and somehow it's your birthday already. But somehow I think I used the term "19 years old" very little and somehow I feel I didn't spend 365 days as a "19 year old"...

Now my life seems to be at a complete stand-still. Being NSF - the experience makes you a better person, but you are just not progressing in life. I'm not studying, not starting a family, not working long-term in a company - from what I see - I'm just taking a long break from life and found myself so detached from the society and the norm. Everyday people are trying to get their degrees, starting their families, climbing the career ladder. Somehow this 2 years seem to be quite a waste from this perspective.

But there are some advantages. I tend to have time to read more, have time to give tuition (for extra money lol) and have time to watch anime + play games...

Actually the tuition experience is quite "eye-opening" to me. 2 students and I realise that "you can only study well only if you really want to study". There's really not much use trying to go for tuition when you don't do your own memory work memorising Physics equations. And there's no use going for 5 / 6 tuitions a week when you don't find the purpose of studying and not disciplined to study.

Somemore I feel quite amused when the parent told me to help to discipline the child and inspire the child to study. What can a tutor do in 2 hours a week? Somehow I think this type of requests seem to be quite absurd and shows how their own family education failed.

I managed to read "for one more day" by Mitch Abloom this week. And I was quite touched by some of the phrases mentioned in the book.

"I'm not ashamed by my job as a cleaner. I'm a mother. I have to provide for my family."

Parents doing so much to raise their children.

And most of all,

"Children don't realise that they are a wish come true of their parents."

I think that's the most powerful phrase in the book, summarising everything into just a short sentence.

I hope I'm still someone's dream come true after 20 years.

Labels: Thoughts